how i get through the week

Monday: working at the photo lab. The atmosphere is just as chill and chemical-y as last semester, and Adam's and my shifts still run back to back. It's not a bad way to ease into the week.

Tuesday: Tuesday Tradition still reigns supreme, though it took us a few weeks to get going. The Tradition is even better now that I have my very own SuperMug (TM) thanks to Adam. That is a 32 oz tankard of beer... delicious.

Wednesday: I begin with Bitch Wednesday, in which Maddie and I chill for an hour in the SG offices and complain about the liberals. Then, I have my weekly dinner with Miranda, one of the few friends I have left on campus.

Thursday: Take-out/TV Thursdays at the Rices. Mrs. Rice works Thursdays, so Mr. Rice always brings home something yummy for us to munch on while we kill braincells by watching The Office.

Friday: Payday! After teaching piano from 12-6, I have a friendly amount of money to deposit into my bank account.

friday five

Actually posting on Friday? Amazing.

Top 5 Things Every Girl Needs

1. A planner. I love these things so much that I have two of them. For me, writing in my planners keeps my sanity under control. But the flipside is that any time I'm bored/waiting/trying to look important, all I do is pull out my planner and start scribbling and taking notes and boom, problem solved.

2. A secret. Don't ask me why, but it seems a girl with a little mystery is always way cooler than one who seems like she's playing the game with an open hand. In my opinion, the secret should be something potentially exciting, not just what you and your cat ate for dinner last night. I think when you've got something to play closer to your heart, things are just a little spicier.

3. A good strapless bra. I know wearing one is basically as fun as going to the dentist, but a really good one is legit worth its weight in gold. It's difficult to find one that's supports, doesn't diminish your cleavage and won't leave bruises from where the boning digs into your flesh. If you do manage to discover one, hold it like you'll never let it go.

4. A hobby. Be it cooking, knitting, photography, drinking, writing, painting or pole dancing, I firmly believe a hobby is essential to your happiness in life. Without hobbies, it's so easy to get caught up the the spin of work, home, dinner, bed. But a hobby- one you love enough to make time for- will break that cycle and give you a relief from being a normal work drone. Hobbies give a sense of camaraderie and accomplishment that I think most humans- especially women- need.

5. The One Who Got Away/The Heartbreaker. Why do we need such a depressing thing in our lives? Because we need to know our limits. Having a man that, for whatever reason, left such a huge handprint on our hearts (in a less than positive way) shakes a girl out of her security and reminds her that nothing is for certain and sometimes, there's absolutely nothing we could have done to change the ending. Almost every single woman I know that has had such a disabling pinnacle in her life can now speak of it and give it its emotional heartache due, but more importantly, speak to the lessons she learned and how she remembers those principles daily. At least, that's what mine did for me.

friday five

I'm sorry this is late. But with my past week, you should be proud of me for even attempting.

Top 5 Reasons Short Hair Is Good
I'm warming up to it, and I figure this can't hurt.

1. Showering time is cut in half. I never knew how much time shampooing and conditioning all that hair really took, not to mention the time wringing water out of it via a towel. I can now shower and blow it dry it about the same time it took me to simply shower and clip it up before.

2. My earrings are now uber prominent. Not that you could miss the two inch silver angel wings before, but now that my earrings generally go past the tips of my hair, they're definitely noticeable. I like this. I take pride in my jewelry.

3. I'm more encouraged to wear scarves. I didn't always utilize my collection of a dozen scarves, but they're definitely making a comeback. Without hair to cover the back of my neck, it's now mandatory for me to be swathed in a scarf, or I'm one unhappy camper (like how I spun that negative into a positive?).

4. It's an adventure. With my long hair, I sort of knew what to expect, what styles would work well in what situations, how it would look if I did this or that. Now, it's like waking up and beginning a jungle safari with my hair. If I hold the brush at this angle, how will it ultimately dry? How much of this product is necessary? It's a constant guessing game, that's for sure.

5. I get a lot of compliments. Not going to lie, my ego sincerely appreciates it, since I can't shake the nasty feeling that I look like a boy.

i think about how it might have been

I'm a bit terrified of tomorrow.

My hair and I have always had a strange relationship. It's always been the most beautiful part of me, I know that, and It knows that. When I was little, everyone loved my hair. It was long, thick and shiny, and everyone played with it so much that I finally became sick of the attention and banned the attention. I regret that decision now. I didn't realize how that gesture could soothe the stress. By now, I'm too old, they've learned not to, blah, blah, all the excuses. But I miss having my hair stroked, I miss that calm, I miss that security and reminder of childhood.

Right now, it is the longest it has been since I last cut it for Locks of Love (which was over 3 years ago), and perhaps the longest it's been ever. It's almost to the small of my back, I can reach my arm around and not even lift a finger to touch it. And it's still the most beautiful part of me. I know that. It can be curled, it can be straight, it can be all big and wavy, and somehow, I can always feel attractive when I've got those layers to flip over my shoulder.

But the day after tomorrow, it's all going away. And to be 100% vain and 100% transparent, I'm honest-to-God, drama-free, terrified that with It goes my one claim to beauty. I'm Jo March, trading her locks for... what? A Greater Cause? I can only hope. Because I'm so scared I'm going to be ugly when my hair is gone, that it will be painfully obvious I'm still just a chubby, short Asian girl who just wants to be praised. Only now, there might not be anything worth praising.

Don't lie and tell me looks don't matter. I'm beginning to think that in this world, along with death and taxes, that's the only fact that will never change.

friday five

Yes, it's late, and I apologize.

Top 5 Good Things About This Semester

Because the list was originally "Top 5 Bad Things" and then I realized, nobody likes a party pooper.

1. My awesome law professor. He came and spoke to my reporting class last semester and he was the coolest cat ever. He used to be a defense lawyer, so he had some pretty amazing stories, and he had this easy-going yet incredibly intelligent way about him that makes me think maybe my Monday night block will not be like stabbing myself in the eye with a spork.

2. Being 21. I know, it'd make more sense for this item to be in a "Top 5 Good Things About Last Semester" but think about it- for about 2/3 of last semester, I wasn't. So. Here's to being 21 for my final semester of school, and being able to drink whatever I want from January to May.

3. A Lighter Bag. I.E., I don't have FOUR classes in a row on Mondays and Thursdays. Elie and Mrs. Rice will attest to the ridiculousness of it the past semester, and thank god this semester the most classes I have in a row are two, and at the moment, neither of those have any books (and might not, because they're both news design/multimedia classes). Booyah!

4. A New Music Editor. Not that I love the Eagle any more (or to be more accurate, hate it any less), but the absence of One Ex Music Editor makes my heart sing and almost makes me excited enough to go back and actually work there as opposed to me coming up with my own story ideas and writing them because I feel like it. Almost.

5. The Election Is Over. No more "race for the White House." No more "controversy." Granted, we'll still have to examine Obama's presidency, but for the love of Mike, I don't want to hear another word about Sarah Palin. And considering my courses, I don't think I will.

BONUS (because I feel mildly bad that I legit missed my friday five)

6. This Is A New Semester. A lot, and I mean a LOT, of shit happened in Fall '08. Some of it made me better, but some of it made me a whole lot worse. By the simple fact that This Is Not That Semester, Spring '09 has to be something good.

i would just hope my last thought was a good one

i've never been the biggest fan of Scrubs, but tonight I realized what this show has mastered and few others get.

Their music kicks ass.

I'm watching the new episodes, and I don't know if it's just because I love this song, or that the script was pretty decent, or that I'm feeling hormonal, but hearing Ben Gibbard's soft vocals underscoring the death of a patient was unbearably perfect. The characters are sitting there laughing and joking and being all brave, but once that guitar riff started, my heart sunk, and you know? You knew, as the audience (and Death Cab For Cutie fan), it was over.

And that's something I can get behind. These writers or scouts or producers know the power of a good song. They GET that the perfect melody can take their good show and good script and good actors and make them GREAT. I've rewound this episode four times, because I can't fucking let this go.

I'm sitting here, almost in tears, at this Greatness.

Friday Five

Didja miss me? I took last Friday off since it was the day after Christmas and all, but the extra week gave me time to compile this extremely difficult and selective list. As a disclaimer, I specifically did not use any entries from people I know personally, because favoritism is never pretty.

Top 5 Journal Entries (Not Mine)
I read a lot of blogs. But these are the five, brutally honest works that inspire me to keep writing in this journal and to keep attempting to find the words to express my thoughts. Please note the asterisk'd entries contain objectionable content, and a double asterisk implies extremely graphic content. You have been warned.

1. I Loved You - from Unknown
I don't remember how I found this entry, but it was so poignant that I felt the need to post it in Jewelness the first time I discovered it. There's just something about the perfect blend of stream-of-consciousness and emotion that created an entry I have never forgotten.

2. Not Everyone Can Be November, You Know - from lightsfallup
This entry, passed on to me by MoreToKnow (another of my favorite bloggers), immediately resounded with me because, well, it's about November. It thrilled me to see November finally getting its due (we always get the suckiest photos in calendars), and in one of the most abstract and poetic ways I've ever seen. The paragraph starting with "not everyone can be november, you know. not the way you mean it..." is one of two "lyrics" that I know I could tattoo on my body and be content the rest of my life.

3. *The Perfect Woman, Moments, The Glass - from VK's Empire of Dirt
VK is one of the bloggers I found through Roissy (who, though a misogynist and Kevin all over, is one of the most entertaining bloggers I've ever read), when VK hosted a week where a circle of bloggers wrote entires on "The Perfect Woman." This entry, though mildly explicit, shows such a vulnerable, emotional side of a man who is only a few steps below Roissy on the player scale, that it is worthy of this list.

4. **L - from (title withheld but a link here for the depraved)
Here's the best part of the entry, for those who aren't going to read the rest because of its double asterisk:
"And it’s not at that moment or this one that I feel L has been misused. It is that in this effort for connection, in this testing of bonds, we all are. Where there is need or want there is danger. We introduce ourselves to disappointment, time and time again. We create illusion and crash ourselves against it. "
Wow. For an entry about having sex with a single mother... that is perhaps the most profound statement I've ever heard. I feel like this writer, whoever he is, somehow sold his soul to the devil in exchange for sleeping with every woman under the sun, and somehow managed to find the impossible nuggets of truth that stick out of his writing like little diamonds.


5. Kindness and Abs. - from Matt Nathanson's Journal
So, this is not the quintessential Matty Nay blog I think of when I think of his blog (it's actually the one about Britney Spears playing basketball on the Ellen Degeneres show). But ever since he signed to Vanguard, his archives got hidden in the depths of the Internet, and this was the next best entry. If you ever hear me utter "Thank you, Mark Wahlberg," you now know why.